Martin (John Amplas), a young man who looks around 20-years-old, boards a train in Indianapolis, Indiana for New York. At night, he breaks into a sleeping car and sedates a woman with a syringe full of narcotics. She struggles, but he tells her not to struggle or be upset because she wont feel pain. After a few minutes, the woman falls asleep, and Martin has sex with the unconscious woman. Afterwards, he slices her wrists with a razor blade so he can drink her blood. The woman bleeds to death in her sleep.
In the morning, the train stops in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania where Martin disembarks. He is met by Tata Cuda (Lincoln Maazel) an elderly and hostile old man who claims to be his cousin from the Old World. Together, they travel by another train to the town of Braddock, a dying industrial suburb. They walk to Cuda's large house where he shows Martin his living quarters. Cuda then accuses Martin of being an 84-year-old vampire from his old country. He has taken in Martin because he is family, but tells him, "First I will save your soul. Then I shall destroy you." Martin denies being a vampire and implies that Cuda is merely his uncle rather than his cousin. Cuda then puts up strings of garlic on the doors to his and his granddaughter's room, and then holds up a small cross when Martin approaches him. Martin takes away the cross, and even takes a bite of the garlic mocking these attempts by saying bitterly, "There's no real magic... ever". Cuda tells Martin that he can come and go as he pleases. But he also warns Martin that he will kill him if he kills anyone in Braddock. He also tells Martin to stay away from his granddaughter Christine (Christine Forrest), whom arrives home from her job that evening.
Cuda introduces Christine to Martin, but also warns her to stay away from him. But Christine instead strikes up a friendship with Martin who confides in her about his vampire heritage. When Cuda later confirms Martin's claims to be a vampire, Christine, not surprisingly, refuses to believe either one. She thinks that Cuda and the other members of her family have driven Martin to insanity by making him think that he is a vampire. It is never revealed if Martin really is a vampire, or just a shy and lonely youth with troubled issues. Christine is the only person that Martin gets the courage to talk to. When Christine's boyfriend Arthur (Tom Savini) arrives at the house for dinner, Martin stops talking and backs away despite Arthur's attempt at a conversation. Christine later confides in Martin that she hopes to leave Braddock someday with Arthur, even though Martin points out that Arthur treats her badly and is both verbally and physically abusive towards her.
When Christine sees that Martin won't talk to anyone else, she buys him a phone which he installs in his room. Martin begins to repeatingly call a radio talk show where he describes what it's like to be a vampire. He becomes known on the radio as "the Count" to all the listeners. But the patronizing host (Michael Gornick) thinks he's just crazy.
Martin gets a job at Cuda's grocery store of stocking shelves, hauling boxes around, and even gets to be a delivery boy for some of the customers. One of his customers is a certain Abby Santini (Elyane Nadeau), who becomes taken in with Martin. She is a very friendly young woman who is depressed when she tells Martin that her husband is unfaithful. But Martin still does not have the nerve to talk with her, so she is happy to have someone to confide in with her life problems. Martin phones the radio show host to describe his infatuation with the housewife and senses that she wants to have sex with him. When the radio show host asks Martin if it is a sexual problem that he has involving women criticizing him during sex, Martin replies that he has never had sex with a woman who was awake.
One day, Martin travels by train to outside Braddock to look for victims. At a supermarket, he follows a young woman (Sarah Venable) home to her posh suburban house. He sees the woman's husband (Richard Rubenstein) leave for a long business trip, and Martin decides this would be the right time for more feeding. Martin returns to the house after dark and breaks in through the garage door. But it is Martin who gets the surprise when he bursts into her bedroom to find her in bed with her adulterous lover Lewis (Al Levitsky). After a vicious struggle, Martin jabs both of them with hyprodermic needles with narcotics, and waits for the drugs to take affect. He drags the unconscious body of Lewis from the house to a clump of trees across the street where he kills him by shoving a broken tree branch into his neck and drinks his blood. Martin returns to the house where he has sex with the unconscious woman. But out of compassion and pity, he decides to let her live.
Martin begins to have romantic monochrome visions of his vampire past (real or imagined), where he drained blood from a young woman and was chased through the streets of a nameless European town by a torch-lit mob.
During one Sunday at church, Cuda brings home Father Howard (George A. Romero) who asks him about the possibility of exorcism and demon possession. Father Howard calls upon the elderly Father Zulemans (Clifford Forrest, Jr.) over at Cuda's request. Together, Cuda and Zulemans confront Martin his bedroom and attempt to perform an exorcism on him. At this point, Martin remembers (another real or imaginary flashback), in the Old Country of people trying to perform an exorcism on him, and he flees them. Martin then flees from Cuda and Zuelmas as well. A little later that night, Martin terrorizes Cuda in a children's playground when he puts on a Dracula cape and puts false fangs into his mouth to pretend that he really is a vampire.
One day, Martin finally musters the courage to talk with Mrs. Santini during a routine delivery to her house where he tells her that he's aware of her attempts to seduce him and wants now to have sex with her. After having sex for the first time, Mrs. Santini becomes more depressed for she tells Martin that her husband just left her because she discovered that she cannot bear children, and that her desires towards him are based on sex and nothing else. But Martin wants to stay with her and help her move on with her life. Martin tells the radio show host about his affair with the housewife and that he no longer has the urge to attack other women.
Meanwhile, Arthur meets with Cuda and tells him that he wants Christine to leave town with him so they can get married and start a family. But Christine becomes angry at Cuda when he tells Arthur that insanity runs in their family and he shouldn't consider having children with her. Shortly afterwards, Christine packs up and leaves Braddock for New York with Arthur despite Martin telling her that Arthur is abusive towards her. But her mind is made up. Before leaving, Christine tells Martin that she really has no ill feelings towards him and just wants to make a fresh start with her life. She says goodbye to him and promises to write. But Martin knows that with an abusive and possessive man in Christine's life, she probably won't.
Depressed over losing his one true friend, Martin phones the radio show host and tells him that he's getting "shaky" and wants to go out looking for more victims. That night, Martin travels to a rough crime-ridden area of Pittsburgh and attacks two derelicts in a alley, injecting them with narcotics. He kills one of them by silting the bum's wrist and drinking his blood. Martin is about to kill the second one when a police car shows up and gives chase. Martin narrowly escapes during a long chase on foot which leads from the garbage strew streets and through a local store. Martin runs into an old warehouse where a drug deal is going down. A shootout between the two cops and the three thugs begins where all of them are killed, leaving Martin as the sole survivor who casually walks away from the carnage.
One day, Martin finds Mrs. Santini dead in her bathtub, after she had slit her writs with a razor blade. Martin anonymously calls the police to report the body and leaves. He phones the radio show host one final time to say that he really doesn't need friends or people to talk to for he is his own person. But when Cuda learns about Mrs. Santini's suicide, is mistakenly thinks Martin killed her and made it look like a suicide as he's done before. Cuda walks into Martin's room while he is asleep and kills him by hammering a wooden stake through Martin's heart.
Cuda buries Martin's body in his back garden, while over the closing credits various voices from people are heard talking to the radio show host asking the whereabouts of "the Count".
迟早全玩完，你能怎么样？
无论是否在讽刺调侃，都说明3件事：1政府政客都是鬼话连篇，个人是搞不过政客的，哪怕是死亡关头！2、人类总会延续，残酷的是都是有选择的，只是那个幸运符是不是属于你？！3、在末日那一刻，你想干什么？
这文戏不比tv好多了 托马老师当了爸之后更慈祥了 只能说就要男妈妈
明喻，暗喻，设喻，博喻，连喻，延喻都用上了却依然乏善可陈，最大的彩蛋是最后的名单
pps：Melanie’s gorgeous.
嘲讽的点挺多，挺乐呵的。地球毁灭的题材最适合平安夜看了。
托马老师永远滴神，贤人和伦太郎都拿最强形态打，托马老师是一册就完事了。而且托马老师守护小路的眼神是真的赞，并且剧情大体都不错是上乘的外传，只能说你令和老大哥就是厉害
影片虚构了一个故事：科学家探测到一颗彗星六个月后将撞上地球，他们怀着拯救地球的觉悟找到了总统、政府和媒体，至此年度讽刺大戏一出接一出地拉开帷幕，高潮迭起，直至影片结束。
2022.1.9 因为豆瓣8.7的高分来看 看完很失望 反正对我这种没看过这个系列的人肯定是不友好的 首先这片子没有起因 直接开始讲述 导致我前1/4部分看得云里雾里的 后面才看懂 但还是不知道为啥女主会和那个小巨魔互换身体啊？其实是很简单的故事 互换了身体 妈妈照顾小巨魔 女主享受了几天大力 快活的日子 但也想变回去 找了个被关在很多铃铛里的山丘之王 帮助他找回眼睛逃了出来 以为要开战 其实是一个巨大的巨魔在他们城市底下 所以你为什么要呆在地下。。为了保护他们就从来没有起来过 乌鱼子了
还挺娱乐的…… 演唱会挺好…… 饭桌有点触动，包括祷告…… 最后的最后的最后很意味不明……
整体十分优秀的一部作品，如果时长能在长一点，前面两条线应该能处理的更好
给《监视资本主义》和《2021去死》的评价基本可以套到这片上面。用阴谋论打败阴谋论；一边高喊弥合分歧一边展现傲慢。片中用来讽刺好莱坞的那部在彗星撞击当天上映的电影，基本也是本片自己的最佳特写吧。
这个剧场版值得推荐看，小朋友还是不建议看了，不建议给儿童看
真的是笑不出来的无奈。
画面太美
全程都是高质量高密度的嘲讽，把美式民主这套从里到外烂穿了的制度扒了个底儿掉，面对灾难(疫情？）现实恐怕比电影更加魔幻，不过老美看来还是坚信没有他们人类就会完蛋，缺了点胸怀。
当代美国鲁迅，就非常巨魔，打点很精确，所以很奇妙，荒诞又真实。
和前两季动画比确实差点意思，但谁叫这还是希尔达，看到最后一幕依然会心底温暖
跟其他的假面骑士都不太一样，不过中间的剧情还是很好看的
二刷还是三星。片尾的演职表和两个小彩蛋蛮棒的，但这部集当今美帝之乱象的影片带给我的情绪是沮丧的。或许是并不满足于电影仅仅充当反智时代的影像验证，同时又发觉电影能做的，已经和我们一样少得可怜了。
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